Am I Overshadowing Myself?

I know I post a pretty obnoxious amount, and I've probably lost the following of the little audience I had because of the high influx. I'm somewhat conflicted about this. On the one hand, I write my blog mainly for myself, to help me process things that I see, to take notes, and to act as a grading mechanism for STAC. On the other hand, I sometimes have well thought out discussions on my blog, and I wish I could engage more people with me, or help them through my insights. Another issue, should I really be writing public posts purely for myself? If that's my goal, shouldn't I just maintain a journal with my notes instead?

When I first started blogging, most of my posts would be under my current category of "Thoughts." I would have some thoughts about an abstract concept, and I would write in order to understand it better. I had a number of fairly intelligent insights, even when I was just fourteen. Writing was my tool for understanding the world in concrete terms. It was also my way of sharing my understandings so people could comment and learn.

My current writing practice lacks this type of writing. It predominantly exists as a form of gentle amusement. I don't necessarily have a problem with that. However, it does mean that my "thoughts" posts are playing a lesser role than they used to, which is saddening.

Perhaps a simple solution would be to add my thoughts posts to my predominant blog, and keep my library and journey posts here. That is something I am considering, but I'm not so confident in my thoughts posts that I want to share them widely. I feel that I talk about a lot of subjects I don't necessarily have validity on beyond my own personal experience. I don't want to be one of those people who acts like they have the whole world figured out but lacks even a basic sense of how the world works. I don't want to make statements on the pretense like I know what I'm saying when I don't. Are statements valid when they cannot be empirically proven? Are thoughts interesting when they are not hidden under the pretense of creative writing?

While I think many of my insights are true, I don't know if they are necessarily different from what a lot of people say. What makes my thoughts worth more? I could argue that the pure act of writing my thoughts automatically rises me above the level of those who don't even make the effort. Why should people care? Perhaps it doesn't matter why. If they do, then that is good. If they don't, I do something else.

What a hypocrite I am. I want people to read my thoughts, but I don't want them to, and this happens simultaneously.

I don't plan on changing too much yet, but I'm going to do one thing on this STAC blog. Instead of simply copying and pasting the posts from my 365 blog, I'm simply going to talk about the process for each post. This is mainly to appease the requirement of intellectual involvement and artistic continuum for our new assignment. These posts can be passed over easily, while the main focus can return to my thoughts. Maybe I'll do more later. We'll see.