Argument as Active Disagreement

For Argument's Sake

(a TED Talk)

Dan Cohen, an academic working at Colby College, has spent much of his life analyzing the art of argument. According to him there are three kinds of cognitive arguments.

1. Argument as War: Arguing to defeat the other debater in an adversarial context.

2. Argument as Proof: Stating a theory that is up to question. Think for example, mathematical proofs as arguments. This is not necessarily adversarial arguing.

3. Argument as Performance: For example, a political debate. It is like argument as war, but with the audience as additional participants. These audience members essentially act as a kind of jury.

The issue with debate nowadays is that it is primarily centered on the first type of arguing, argument as war. This gives us the mentality that we debate to win. Those who succeed with tactics are right, and those who fail are made to feel ashamed.

The problem with this type of argument is that it elevates tactics over substance. Essentially, the debate becomes less about the subject at hand and more at wanting to win. What does this winning accomplish? It may be rewarding, but defeating someone in an argument doesn't actually contribute much to you as a person.

In fact, you gain MORE by losing an argument, because you are able to absorb new facts that you never considered and find new solutions. Productive argument means that two people are working together to find a solution. Refutation only acts as a way of eliminating what is ineffective, and not as a manner of proving superiority.

It is a shame that people in this world believe that winning is more important than compromise, and I believe this sets us back and prevents us from resolving serious issues in our society.

So the next time you argue with someone, think less about proving yourself right, and more about what the other person has to say. You may learn something.

3 Years of Blogging: A Reflection Thus Far

In the process of revitalizing our blogs for better PR, I have read through many of my old posts. It's similar to reading through old pages in a diary, especially for some of my more emotional posts, most of which I have deleted by now.

The Art of Mindless Rambling
Back in the early days of my blog, I would think about an abstract concept I wanted to put into words, and I started to write. My writing lacked direction, but in the end I redeemed myself. Some people ask me, "Why do you blog so much? Why do you blog?" The answer is, I blog to understand. Putting thoughts into words brings understanding and control to the world around you. Personally, I believe that analyzation is an important and necessary step in the development process.

When you analyze and reflect on your actions,

1. You figure out what is right or wrong for you
2. You figure out WHY things are right or wrong
3. You use this knowledge to see what you have to develop, and then you can target certain areas

When you analyze and reflect on the world around you,

1. You understand why people behave the way they do
2. You learn how to fit yourself into the complex system of living
3. You become more confident in your opinions because you can back them up with evidence

When you write without direction,

1. You make your thoughts seem more physical, which is empowering
2. You discover the solutions to your problems by working them out step by step
3. Random statements can inspire new ideas

Even right now, I don't know where this point is going to end up. I'm just writing and hoping I figure out something amazing.

There are a number of things that I am proud of in those posts. I was astonished by the complexity of my thinking and the prose I had when I was just 15 years old, such as this one I wrote.

"There's a third thing that affects a person's emotions. What happens in their body that they're not even aware of. Teenagers are known for often having mood swings because of their raging hormones. Girls get PMS. It's beyond our control.

Even though our minds are so strong, we are still at the will of our basic animal habits. Instead of our mind guiding our bodies, our bodies guide our mind, and they don't have the common sense that the mind does.

Sometimes I think the emotions we feel are false."

Clever stuff. There's more, but my brain is too mush at the moment to look it up.

Presentability
I've encountered two main issues with the presentations of my blog posts. One is a bit of an antithesis. Because many of my posts lacked direction, I don't know how to categorize them, how to explain them, or how to make them more appealing to the reader. I have clever thoughts jumbled with nonsense, and deciphering those thoughts would take me a lot of time, perhaps more time than I'm interested in spending. At the moment, I am working on making my posts briefer, more organized, and more visual.

The other is the emotionality of my posts.

I'm just going to say this and get it out of the way. In my first two years of high school, I was seriously depressed. There was no one specific reason. It was a culmination of a number of issues in my life at the time. Yes, I did think everyone in STAC hated me at the time. Ironic isn't it? Now you see why Luke jabs me about it. But you see, I didn't understand what was happening to me, and I didn't know how to reach out for the help I needed to understand.

My STAC Blog became my main line of communication when I had none. I'm thankful that I had support through my writing, and it got me through a very difficult time in my life. However, I am now uncomfortable about how intimate many of the blogposts were. That's why I've deleted many of them.

The Past
As a senior in high school, I've been forced to do much reflecting. Last weekend I spent my Saturday answering a questionnaire given by my social studies teacher, in order to get a recommendation letter. I thought about questions such as "How have you changed since 9th grade? What is one of your biggest achievements? Biggest regrets?" There is much to say about how I've changed and improved.

However, I don't think I'm done yet. I have one more year and I have very particular battles that I have to fight before I'm ready to move on in my life. Right now, that battle is the recent past.

Another thing to get out of the way. Earlier last year, I decided to quit the idea of becoming a professional musician. This is because I seemed like I was playing music only because I FELT like I should, and not because I actually wanted to. When I finally chose to do things because I wanted to, that's basically when my depression ended.

Still, I haven't come to full terms with quitting music yet. When I see videos about artists, it makes me nervous. When people ask me to perform, I usually say no because I don't want to make myself committed. Generally, being around music in an artistic and creative way still gives me anxiety.

I've tried to logically think my way out of it but to no avail. I know that I can create art without wanting to become a professional artist, but this thought does not comfort me as much as it should.

Even for my college essay, in which I explained that I became much happier once I stopped music, my English teacher commented to me, "It seems like this essay lacks closure." To that I retorted, "It lacks closure because I lack closure." He laughed so hard he almost did a spit take. The irony is humorous, and I laugh at it myself, but the distress is not.

There is something I haven't coped with somewhere. And that's what I need to deal with this year so I can move on with the rest of my life.

Facebook for Culture

In search of new media, people follow blogs, watch TV, listen to radio, read books, and follow Twitters. But one form of social media that often seems neglected to me is Facebook. I don't mean that in the form of socializing. Facebook is the king of social networking. I mean in using Facebook as a tool to share art.

Though most people use facebook to post witty retorts and shameless selfies, Facebook can actually be a great tool for learning about cool facts and art world happenings.

I want to share a few of my favorite Facebook pages.

Art and Architecture

Art & Architecture is a behemoth of a Facebook page. In fact, to say "page" in the singular form would be false. Though Art & Architecture is a general page, there are a multitude of regional varieties, featuring countries such as Spain, Ukraine, Canada, and Libya, just to name a few. In addition, there are a number of "Art &" pages, such as Art & Fashion, Art & Literature, Art & Freedom, and Art & Landscape Design, just to name a few.

The main A&A page features spectacular buildings, beautiful city scenes, inspirational artistic quotes, and clever urban design.

Don't forget your Salvador Latté

Biologia-Vida

Biologia-Vida is a page that features images of exotic plants and creatures. I'm guessing it's Brazilian because it's written in Portuguese but I don't know for sure. Thankfully, all descriptions are also translated into English, although with some of these images, descriptions aren't even necessary to describe the awe.

Who knew bats could dance?

Cultura Inquieta

Cultura Inquieta is a culture blog, as could be assumed by the name. Generally, it is a collection of interesting pictures, sculptures, and paintings. Some images are modern while others are throwbacks. Some feature active artists both in the visual and performing realm.

Humans of New York (HONY)

I'm sure all of you know about HONY, but if you don't, you HAVE to follow this facebook page IMMEDIATELY. What makes HONY such an amazing photo blog is the way that exceptional pictures are cleverly paired with small anecdotes. Somehow, Brandon Stanson knows exactly what questions to ask in order to get to the core of a person's being. When you look at these pictures, you become engulfed in these people's lives. It's incredible.

9GAG

I admit, 9GAG is more often stupid entertainment than it is art. Still, it's a great page for memes, humor, fun facts, and the occasional spout of political brilliance.

George Takei

Alright, I know this one sounds silly. In all seriousness though, George Takei has an excellent facebook page, especially for those interested in gay rights and nerd culture. This page gives me the occasional laugh.

If anyone else knows of any interesting facebook pages, share them here!

L'inconnue de la Seine

L'inconnue de la Seine

(Based off of a radio piece by Radiolab)

Back in the late 1800s, it was a common custom for people people in upper-class European society to create death masks out of the faces of their loved ones to save their image.

However, there is one well-known face that does not have any high-class associations. That is the face you see above.

Where did this mysterious woman come from, and how did she become so famous? L'inconnue de la Seine literally translates to The Unknown of the Seine. The theory is a common French story. A woman comes from the country side to Paris, meets a beaux, has a passionate love affair, and is later left in despair after she becomes pregnant. Most likely, the inconnue threw herself into a river.

Another common aspect of the funeral process in those days was to display each corpse found in a glass case, in order for family members to identify them. The inconnue was never identified, but everyone was so taken back by her beauty, the mortician decided to create a plastic mold of her face. 

Eventually this mask because distributed throughout mask maker's workshops and households. The face became so esteemed that it attracted the attention of writers such as Rilke and Muschler. Everyone wanted to know what made this beautiful woman take her own life, and this mystery perpetuates her mysticism.

Here's where the story gets even weirder.

The Norweigan toy maker Åsmund Laerdal found this face and decided to use it in his newest invention: the first CPR mannequin in history.

The mannequin is known as Resusci Anne. The image of the Inconnue is slightly distorted in Resusci Anne because CPR requires an open mouth, but the resemblance is still clear. Three hundred million people have been trained in CPR using this same face since 1960.

It's almost ironic that the face of the Inconnue was chosen as the visage of the CPR mannequin. Decades ago, people tried to bring this woman back to life through their writings and appreciation, and now, we try to breathe her back to life with cardiopulmonary resuscitation.

Still, all of our interest and all of our actions are ultimately futile, for death is a binding sentence.

BLOG LAYOUT GUIDELINES

There are two things I will be checking on for blogs: Pages and Appearance

Adding Pages

Every blog is required to have these four pages

• Bio
• Resume
• Portfolio
• STAC

The first three are pages you create. The last one is a link.

How to Add a Page

Click here for the explanation on the Blogger help pages.

How to Add a Page that is a Link

Technical Difficulties

If you added your pages but they aren't showing up on your blog, this may help you.

I will be able to help anyone who is still confused, but PLEASE try your best to figure it out or ask another classmate for help before you see me.

Appearance

Make sure that your blog is all of these things

• Readable
• Visually appealing
• Easy to navigate
• Not self incriminating (this mainly applies to older STACies)
• Remember: When in doubt, leave it out

I have looked at all your blogs and I will tell you what you need to change tomorrow.

I want to see these changes as soon as possible, and I will be conducting a second round of criticisms on Monday or Tuesday for those who haven't updated yet.

STAC PR

1. Google Visual Assets Guide
Quick Notes

• Simplified design
• Flat and geometric
• Specific color palettes
• Specific typography
• Proper sizing proportions
• Mood boards

Review

I think the key aspects of branding we can take from this guide are color and typography. This would make any site or formal document we create look excellent.

A.  DaFont

Back when I used to know some html, I used to frequent the site dafont.com. This website offers a wide variety of downloadable fonts, and many of them are free. Companies like Google are able to have graphics designers create topography, but for us, that's not really an option. However, if we download a free font from a more obscure website, we can pretend it's unique to us, and it will have much the same effect.

Google's design emphasizes simplicity, so I feel like the best font to use would be a basic sans serif (as in the tips of the letters don't have wings).

Here are a couple of possible I think would be nice. The thicker texts could be used for titles and the thinner ones for text.

Dinasti

Bebas Neue

Existence Light

B. Color Palettes

I'm not much of an expert on color palettes, but I'm pretty sure there are plenty of people in STAC who are. Like Danny, who loves color theory. I know that Sarah posted about color psychology on the Facebook page and Danny wrote some blogposts. Perhaps there's a way we can use a special color palette that manipulates people into finding our logo appealing!

I found this guide to color palette percentages in Real Simple magazine. It's intended for room design but I'm sure it can apply to us as well.

2. Palantir

Quick Notes

• Slider-show
• Uniform typography
• Exciting pictures
• Easy to use navigation bar
• Special icon
• Pictures of people having fun
• Meet us

Review

Much of what this website demonstrates I've already talked about with the Google design. However there are some things that caught my eye.

Palantir has a specific symbol that they use throughout the website. It has a circle and two conjoined lines underneath.

We ought to have a symbol like that.

Also, I feel like we should include quality pictures of ourselves. We should have profile shots like on the engineering culture page, and pictures of us in action on the life at palantir page.

Speaking of web design, I want to talk about another blogging platform.

A. Wordpress

A few weeks ago my friend Jen was asking me for advice on how to start a fashion blog. One of the things she asked me is what the best blogging platform is. I told her I used Blogger.com, but there were other options, such as Wordpress. After looking at the two, she told me that Wordpress was much more attractive. I decided to check it out for myself.

I made a blog here as a trial run to see how the site worked. I was very impressed! The platform was both easy to use and attractive. I mean this is one of the templates I found on the website itself.

Frankly, compared to Wordpress, I think that Blogger is an ugly looking platform. Actually, I've always thought Blogger was kind of an ugly looking platform, but I wasn't aware of any viable alternatives. I've spent a lot of time trying to find decent templates for Blogger, both for this STAC Blog and my other one. Most of them were unappealing to me, and I think that may have been because of the way Bloggers are laid out, with all of the uncharming text fields, and not because of the inability of designers to make good templates.

I'm not saying we all have to go and switch to Wordpress now, but I think it's something to take into consideration.

3. 11 Tips

Quick Notes

• Idea is offered
• Contributors are rewarded when project comes to fruition

1. Right Crowdfunding Website

I think that we ought to focus on a website meant primary for donating to causes and not specific projects.

In STAC, we do a wide variety of projects, and I view our community as more experimental that export based. Personally I would like to keep it that way as much as possible because I don't like the pressure of having to export product to get money when I'm still developing my core as an artist. Maybe I'm being scared. What I mean is that I don't want us to be so focused on exporting art that we don't have a chance to experiment and make mistakes.

If we were to use a site like Kickstarter, we would need to create a product to give back to the contributors. Frankly, we need to do that anyway, but with Kickstarter it would have to be a specific item. 

To me, causevox seems like the nicest site for this. I think its appearance is equally as attractive as Palatir. However it does say that there is a monthly fee if we raise above $5000. I'll have to look further into this when I'm not dead tired and finishing my homework at 11PM. I'm sorry Luke. I'll do better next time.

By the way, gofundme looks quite good as well.

2. Know your target audience

I want to comment part of a comment I wrote on Danny's blog

We need to have a way to show that the money people donate makes a difference, and have them emotionally connected to the cause. We need to have a way of showing our projects and we need to give people an incentive besides "look at those cute kids!" That is not a legitimate incentive for most people. We should take inspiration from the sports and music programs at our school. Perhaps we could ask for people to donate money to STAC during the musical, because many STACies are in the musical and the show gathers a considerable crowd. 

So I say we first target the school before we go outside, and we do it the same way the other school programs do. I think fundraising at the musical is a VERY good idea.

3. Plan ahead

We should plan on finding a good way to demonstrate what we accomplish in the workshops. Perhaps post slideshow pictures on our future beautiful blog and crowdfunding website!

4. Passionately pitch product

We will have to make a video to encourage people to donate. There is no denying. 

5. Plan ahead for spending money

I think Luke has done this by laying out future workshops. 

6. Leverage your social networks

Everyone should bother their friends, but not too much. Posts on Facebook and Twitter would be smart. If anyone is a secret internet celebrity on an obscure website, that'd be nice to share.

7. Break up bigger projects

I wonder how relevant this is to STAC. It is possible that we could divide our crowdfunding into different projects for different workshops, but it'd probably be better to pool the money. Perhaps if individual STACies need funding to work on their own projects, we could designate them separately.

8. Create compelling awards

We need to share some product. Perhaps we can get involved in ethical causes.

9. Treat crowdfunding like a campaign

Same as #6

10. Tell a great story

Perhaps we can steal some pieces from Ron DeMaio's STAC documentary.

Also, I think that the commercials we made for STAC 3 years ago are a good example. Most of you were probably not in high school yet, but 3 years ago we made a number of great commercials that focused on individuals and how STAC helped them pursue their passions. We had one for Ashley Coppolino and Alex Katz. In Ashley's, she had her big camera lens, and photos were thrown around in an extravagant way, making it visually appealing. In Alex's, he said the same line in different voices and characters, making it humorously appealing. Those commercials were great and I think that's how we should show STAC.

11. Give credit where it is due

If we publish some of our art, we could list the contributors in the credits of movies or the back of booklets.

4. Kickstarter

A. Afterschool Art at PS 20

I like how each kid contributes to one drawing. I also like the narration over action about why art is special.

We can't copy the idea for this project completely. We are not elementary school kids in a city neighborhood. We are upper-middle class teenagers on Long Island. We need to find that element of pathos that will encourage people to donate to us. I think we need to brand ourselves as mature artists.

That reminds me, we should look back at that video the Georgians made about us.

B. Georgian Television Spot

Two years ago, a Georgian television network came and made a video about STAC. First of all, I think we could quote this video to show the worth of STAC. 

More importantly though, I think we should show ourselves like we're a cool art class from the movies.

One of the most important people in my artistic community is my friend Tony. He's a highschooler in Venezuela who wants to be a writer (he's nearly done with his first book), and he's quite invested in the arts. When I told him about STAC, he was very interested. He asked me to explain what it was. Of course, as many of you know, it is very hard to explain what STAC is. I showed him the video, to which he remarked, "Wow! It's like the American movies!" He was so impressed! 

What we have here in STAC is very special. It's easy to forget that. That's why we need to fight to hold onto it. Perhaps we can set an example for the future of arts education!

We should take advantage of our specialness. We should make ourselves seem fascinating and we should make people want to keep this unique and modern educational form alive.

5. Go Fund Me

I'm noticing a lot of funding projects for individual kids raising money so they can do the People to People Student Ambassador Program. For those of you who don't know, People to People is a program that sends kids to foreign countries to help people. If you've heard of kids spending part of the summer in Costa Rica, it was probably through People to People.

This makes me think that this website could be appropriate for us.

Frankly, compared to some of the other sites, gofundme seems a bit limited in terms of appearance and options. Perhaps this wouldn't be a problem if we could link to stacworld.net.

Summary

I basically splattered all of the various ideas I had onto this post. Hopefully there is a piece of gold in the pile of coal. I think tomorrow I will re-examine all of these things and try to pick what's best. If other people randomly found a cool idea, please pick it out so we can notice it.

Train

Today I quickly glanced over some of the scripts I have written, and I rediscovered a script I wrote called "Train." It's pretty good, but if people could offer me some advice, that would be much appreciated.

_________

INT. Train

Beth is sitting on a train by herself. A few seats up, two men are sitting and talking.

Man 1

Can you believe what Beth did today?

Man 2

She always does stuff like that.

MAN 1

It still baffles me how she's able to go out there and make such a fool of herself.

MAN 2

I don't get it.

MAN 1

I can't stand it. She always parades around like she knows it all but no one actually likes her.

Beth leans her ears in.

MAN 2

Why does she wear such revealing clothing when she can't pull it off?

MAN 1

It's gross.

MAN 2

She's not even that attractive.

Beth stares at her own outfit. She pulls her shirt down.

MAN 1

I heard last week she was sitting at home alone, crying over a bottle.

MAN 2

Oh Beth, that girl is a lost cause.

MAN 1

I can't even have a normal conversation without her making me feel uncomfortable.

MAN 2

In what way?

MAN 1

In many ways.

Slowly, Beth reclines in her chair.

MAN 1

But you know what it is that I can't stand the most?

MAN 2

What?

MAN 1

The way that she still thinks she has some kind of hope of being a likable person.

Beth stands up from her seat and walks over to the men.

Beth

Excuse me. I don't know what kind of trick you're trying to play but you really need to stop.

MAN 1

What are you talking about?

BETH

I hear what you're saying about me.

MAN 1

Miss, I don't even know who you are.

Beth freezes. Slowly, she walks away from the two men.

MAN 1

Miss, are you alright?

Beth returns to her seat. She quietly cries to herself.

_______





Personally, I thought this was a clever idea for a scene, but I wasn't sure if I executed it as well as I could have. What I love about this scene is how in the end, the girl realizes that in a way, she was imagining all of these things being said about her, even when they weren't related to her. When people are depressed, they often have the tendency to warp their world into a negative view point, taking every action and event as a personal attack, which further worsens their condition. I feel like this is an idea that I can play with.

I had some trouble thinking of insults for the men to say. So if people have any ideas on that regard, that would be helpful.

This STAC blog I mostly use as a sketchpad for ideas. I've decided to keep a separate blog for my more complete works and thoughts. If I get this to the point where I feel good about it, I think I will add it to that blog.

Slaughterhouse 5

Slaughterhouse 5

Amazon: Slaughterhouse Five

Over the summer I bought a number of books, including Slaughterhouse Five. Since I love George Orwell and Aldous Huxley, I figured that I should check out some Kurt Vonnegut, because they seem like they're all in a similar category.

Slaughterhouse Five is about a soldier named Billy Pilgrim, who becomes unstuck in time and relives his past and future moments at random instants. The story itself mainly revolves around the bombings in Dresden.

To call this book an anti-war novel would be a crude simplification. It's against war, but it's also a satire, science fiction, metafiction, and random compendium of thoughts. 

One of the major points the novel makes it that all time happens at the same time. Billy Pilgrim transfers between all of these moments in his life because they are all happening simultaneously. The past and the future all exist. To expand upon this, the novel has the fatalistic view that all events are inevitable, and we do not have the will to change our fate. All we can do is change our thoughts. One of the aliens Billy meets says, I've visited thirty-one inhabited planets in the universe. Only on Earth is there any talk of free will"

What I love most about this book is the style of writing. Vonnegut does not sound like a writer when he writes. I think you guys can figure out what I mean by this. "The radiant sun was gazing across the silver shining water as Freddy took a sip from his delectable cocktail, and though he felt happy, he wondered why he felt so empty on the inside." Excessive detail and shallow emotionality aren't much my taste. In fact, I often prefer non-fiction to fiction for that reason. Vonnegut's writing style is extremely raw, and ever since I started reading his novels, I've tried to imitate it, at least to a certain extent. Perhaps you will see that tomorrow when us writers hand out our literature for talent show day.

I would like to share a few quotes from the book.

__

The dog, who had sounded so ferocious in the winter distances, was a female German shepherd. She was shivering. Her tail was between her legs. She had been borrowed that morning from a farmer. She had never been to war before. Her name was Princess. 

---

Now he quoted Theodore Roosevelt, whom he resembled a lot;
"I could carve a better man out of a banana."

---

And then Billy traveled in time to when he was sixteen years old, in the waiting room of a doctor. Billy had an infected thumb. There was only one other patient waiting--an old, old man. The old man was in agony because of gas. He farted tremendously, and then he belched. 

"Excuse me," he said to Billy. Then he did it again. "Oh God-" he said, "I knew it was going to be bad getting old." He shook his head. "I didn't know it was going to be this bad."

---

On the eigtht day, the forty-year-old hobo said to Bill, "This ain't bad. I can be comfortable anywhere."

"You can?" said Billy. 

On the ninth day, the hobo died. So it goes. His last words were, "You think this is bad? This ain't bad."

___

Before I end this post, I would like to include a picture of writing tips that I once found on Facebook. It's brilliant

Bio and Lyrics

Artist's Biography

Ellen Cooper was born in Albertson, New York in 1996. She currently attends Herricks High School where she in an active participant in the STAC arts program.

Ellen started playing violin when she was three years old. From there, she expanded and took other instruments other her wing, such as the saxophone, piano, and guitar. Growing up in the home of a musicologist, she was strongly influenced to follow musical passions. She became an active participant in her school's pit orchestra, where she has played various instruments from violin to accordion. In her 10th grade year, she played a total of 8 instruments for her school's production of Metamorphoses.

Her mother introduced her to the East European folk music and dance community at a very young age. When she was fourteen, the EEFC created a young people's band called Čoček Nation, led by Sarah Ferholt. Ellen became one of the first members as the resident accordion player. Čoček Nation occasionally performs at venues throughout New York City.

Ellen started writing songs in her 9th grade year, and in her 10th grade year, she wrote and recorded her first album called The Enneagram, based on the eponymous personality typing system created by G. I. Gurdjieff. The album was mixed by previous audio engineer and STAC teacher Luke DeLalio, and released onto Bandcamp.

However, she later had a change of heart that caused her to abandon writing music. She experimented in the world of film, creating a movie called Story of a Relationship about a teen lesbian couple and their love that could never be. In the meantime, she also cultivated her STAC blog, where she currently posts culture commentary, artistic discussions, and personal narratives.

At the moment, Ellen is completing her last year of high school and searching for her future vocation.

Them Heavy People Lyrics

They made me see what I never knew existed

Throwing me sideways, 90 degrees

They gave me thoughts I'd forgotten about

Of history and stories and creative plays

I had a plan but it stopped making sense

Stopped living for shoulds, it felt so free

No life plan is guaranteed, let it be

Everyone works out in the end

Pre School Post

I've had quite a summer, from bribing viola players with candy to listen to Ben Folds Five, to learning the art of gypsy dance with Dutch people in Transylvania. Great experience, lots of learning, things like that.

I've been journaling daily since the beginning of the year, analyzing my behaviors and trying to improve upon them. I've tried to become more mature, less irritating, and happier in life. For the most part I have succeeded.

This year, I'm hoping that I can have set projects to work on, without many questions, without much room for interpretation. I know that one day I will have to learn how to make proper decisions, but for now, I simply want to make my way out of the vicious cycle of inaction. I need structure.

I've thought a lot and probably the most important thing I've learned is that you can't think your way out of everything. You grow through experience, not analyzation alone. Experience brings new factors for you to analyze. Without the influx of experiences, you end up in a thinking loop. It's physically impossible to conceive of your future possibilities 100%. There are factors that appear later that you don't know about earlier.

And so, my hope is to get more hands on. I've done the thinking and it's time to do the doing. Get the doing done. Done did. Doe.